Versus Technology

Maybe it is better my internet doesn’t work on this fucking machine.
Windows 7 can suck my balls, and BT broadband, for as long as it keeps telling me that I can’t get on the internet as apparently I’m attempting to connect through an external non-preferential DNS server. So I do as the good instructions say. (Bear in mind that it uses the internet to pull up this info).

Go to connection properties, click on some shit that says ‘Find DNS automatically’ and boom we should be flying away. Flying and flying. Woosh woosh up we go, World Wide Web here I come!

But no. Not a chance in hell.
You set it to go as autopilot as it can permit and then the bastard changes itself back to its original DNS setting, it’s like self harming .

“NOOO I can do this on my own, leave the numbers I had in place alone please for fuck sakes I’ll change back every time you close the settings, I’ll do it you watch me!” – Internet settings.

And it does, it’s driving me absolutely up the wall. And now at a 162 words. I can finally lay this stress to rest.
(Now 173 if you don’t include this bracketed bit because that takes it to 186, but writing a number counts as a word so now 197/198/199/200. ((IT STOPS IF YOU DO FORWARD SLASHES TO STOP THE BASTARD)) I hate this thing’s logic because I don’t understand it, I sound like an American, or worse yet, a Tumblrina)

I still can’t connect to the internet to look for another job, I have a job at the moment – yay for me – and I wish to look for more but I’ve updated my CV on here (my laptop) and need to upload it everywhere else. I suppose I could transfer it on to my tablet, the horrible thing, and upload from there. Because for whaaaaaaatever stupid reason my Kindle has no problems with DNS shit or BT as a whole. Sometimes it flakes out but a quick reset to the WiFi sorts it right out.

I really don’t understand it. I’m being lazy – The Kindle fire is an absolute tossed off cripple of a tablet. It runs on an Android OS but because it’s an Amazon product, they decided to model the software into their own Fire OS. Which is odd considering that they are huge rivals; so why use Android but disable the lavish spoils of the Google marketplace and can’t thanks to the fact that you can’t download the proper Framework for any Google app. Because rivalry hurrrrrr duurrrrrr.

You could download mirrors for the .apk files, pop them in, sideload the bastards and then download the framework separately placing them into the correct directory on the ‘device’.
But no. Nope, nada.
If you try to install Google Play software offline to prevent the Google servers from trying to download the correct framework for the .apk, the device will still tell me that it couldn’t download from the Google Servers even though it’s already downloaded and sitting in the right place for it all to work.

So I look for the next best alternative on the Amazon App store. Which is riddled with knock off copycat applications that don’t work at all (Such as the Fallout Shelter app I actually paid a quid for and nearly broke my Kindle Fire 7 HD Alpha Max Turbo Edition, or do work (past installation) and work in horrific and slow splendour.

Am I doing something wrong? Anyone else know how to defy the pest of 4th Gen Kindle Fire 7’s bollocks seemingly closed integration software situation? Because hacking it or ‘JellyBeaning’, ‘fuckingitinthearse’ or whatever is exceedingly difficult on this thing and I want to kill it but I can’t because it was a birthday present.

Hacking a PSP 1000 felt like slicing a PSP 1000 cake. So simple you could do it whilst wiping your arse with a feather duster. Mine still works, since day of release. Countless games played: PSP, PS1 and anything below that Gen. Countless hours wasted. Like this isn’t a complete waste of time.

Maybe I’m stupid, maybe the ‘device’ is stupid. Google isn’t stupid (because I know they’re watching, keep them sweet people) and Amazon is beyond stupid for this terrible move. No wonder they sell these occasionally useful abominations for fifty quid now.  I don’t even read books off of it anymore. (I read three) (I’m using brackets a lot today)

(.)(.) Boobs.

So fine this will now be transferred via. wire to my Kindle which I can then upload it from.


Feel free to contact me and tell me what to do, or just say you’re having the same problem so we’re no longer alone. Because to some people, when they have problems they feel like they’re the only person in the world experiencing it. Well you never are. I’m here.

TiredPleb x


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